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Don’t Worry, Senior Prank Still On

May 26, 2020

Class of 2020 let me hear you mute those motherf*ckin mics!

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Health Update: Dodge Sophomore needs Artsy Undie Run pregame or She Will Combust

May 26, 2020

Sophomore Film Production major Lauren Dib is in critical condition.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

P-Safe Has Swords Now

May 26, 2020

“Up until now, we’ve relied on verbal intimidation to fight crime on campus, but now, with this pandemic we had no choice but to use swords.”

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

13 Reasons Why I Deserve To Fuck Timothée Chalamet

May 26, 2020

I need this.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Students Look Forward To Spending Three Months at Home After Three Months at Home

May 26, 2020

That’s right, it’s summer, the only time of year where you can finally sit around the house and do nothing!

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

An Ode to Undie Run

May 26, 2020

Writing this was healing.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

The Kumquat’s Guide to Sex

April 24, 2020

Whether you’re safe or not, you definitely should be having it!

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Panther Village Residents Allowed To Stay Because Honestly Who Really Cares

April 24, 2020

One group of on-campus residents have stayed put

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Friend’s Coronavirus Podcast “Uninspired”

April 24, 2020

Senior Tommy Beckendorf’s new podcast is proof that just because you have time to make something, doesn’t mean you should.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

RA Struggles to Adjust Back to Lawless Home

April 24, 2020

Kaylee Jones is having a difficult time back home in San Jose after being stripped from her title of Pralle Resident Advisor.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Mom, come here, I need you take another thirst trap of me

April 24, 2020

Hey. Hey, Mom. Mama. My beautiful madre. Mommy!!! Come on, it’s time! It’s finally golden hour.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Roomies Face Homoerotic Subtext

April 24, 2020

Quarantine with the girls has taken a yearnful turn at a local Dodge house.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

It's raining? What the fuck?

March 22, 2020

Guys did you notice the insanity of what has been happening this weekend... it’s fucking RAINING?

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

How to Flirt in Zoom Class

March 22, 2020

Aggressively winking at your crush just won’t quite cut it.

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

Black Announcement

February 12, 2020

The Kumquat’s resident 1.6% back again.

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In Spring 20, Special Edition, Valentines Edition Tags spring2020

Calling All #GirlBosses, It’s Recruitment Season!

January 29, 2020

Oh my god, hey girl! Those boots are so cute!

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In Spring 20 Tags spring2020

MORE SHIT

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The Parking Lot Games: Catching Rainfall
Dec 13, 2023
The Parking Lot Games: Catching Rainfall
Dec 13, 2023
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Pete the Panther Stole My Boyfriend
Dec 13, 2023
Pete the Panther Stole My Boyfriend
Dec 13, 2023
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I love chapman!!!!!
Dec 13, 2023
I love chapman!!!!!
Dec 13, 2023
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Undie Run in the Woke Age
Dec 13, 2023
Undie Run in the Woke Age
Dec 13, 2023
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New Years Resolution: I'm done with attention
Dec 13, 2023
New Years Resolution: I'm done with attention
Dec 13, 2023
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Featured
Should You Drop Out?
Jan 17, 2023
Should You Drop Out?
Jan 17, 2023

personally, i am despite what my answer is

Jan 17, 2023
What mode of obnoxious campus transportation are you?
Nov 4, 2021
What mode of obnoxious campus transportation are you?
Nov 4, 2021

The skateboarder……. he’s right behind you

Nov 4, 2021
Does he have a boat?
Sep 28, 2021
Does he have a boat?
Sep 28, 2021

He fuckin’ better

Sep 28, 2021
Which racist professor are you?
Jan 29, 2020
Which racist professor are you?
Jan 29, 2020

If you’re a POC student, don’t worry you’re none of them :)

Jan 29, 2020
Which sorority should you be in?
Jan 29, 2020
Which sorority should you be in?
Jan 29, 2020

Your friends are all doing it, so why not I guess?

Jan 29, 2020
Which bathroom should you shit in during your 15 minute break in your 3 hour lecture?
Dec 9, 2019
Which bathroom should you shit in during your 15 minute break in your 3 hour lecture?
Dec 9, 2019

GOD HURRY IT’S CROWNING

Dec 9, 2019
Which acquaintance should you pipe tonight?
Dec 9, 2019
Which acquaintance should you pipe tonight?
Dec 9, 2019

You know it has to be one of them. God, you’re so horny.

Dec 9, 2019
Which 'not like other girls' girl are you?
Dec 9, 2019
Which 'not like other girls' girl are you?
Dec 9, 2019

Do you own a pair of Doc Marten’s? Are you voting for Pete Buttegieg? What sets you apart?

Dec 9, 2019
What Frat Party Theme Are You?
Dec 1, 2019
What Frat Party Theme Are You?
Dec 1, 2019

TRICK QUESTION any answer with you at a frat is a bad one

Dec 1, 2019