Freshmen skate crew “The Wheely Wheely Good Skaters” is on the grind for an additional grimey grom to fill in for our boy, Dylan.

The Hashinger Basement Cucumber incident last year sparked a national conversation about fraternity hazing, and Chapman has been forced to tighten their regulations.

Chapman-approved wall adhesive and sticky tack were nowhere to be found in Kramer’s dorm, despite numerous confederate flags hung up on his walls.

This guy absolutely fucks. He has salt and pepper hair and lips that yearn to be kissed. He has this dangerous look in his eyes that scream “I sent people to Iraq.”

Word is out that taking 40 rips from a flavored e-cigarette might just be unhealthy.

After rolling up his sleeves, Alan (as the students can now call him) told the class that he sometimes likes to joke around with his students, but all in good fun.

Put down the protein supplements, get the fuck off those ellipticals — your favorite excuse to eat basically ice cream is back and more accessible than ever.

Rising sophomore Aaron Carney is reportedly “very excited” to be condescending as fuck to his freshman friends this semester.

When Dean Jerry Price took a “We’ll Tell You if You’re Having a Hot Girl Summer” Buzzfeed quiz - the results were conclusive.

There’s a lot of excitement at the beginning of the year, but we here at The Kumquat think it is equally important to reflect and mourn what we’ve lost.

Today is a somber day for Panthers both here and abroad.

Four years has taught me a lot about myself, my friends, and, like, academics, or whatever, but what I really learned was how great Chapman is as a school.

Hey guys! I’m looking to sublease my room this summer from June to August!

The Kumquat recently sat down with freshmen Josh Morton and Maria Dunham who are planning on taking their relationship the next level with a big, splashy breakup.

After causing controversy by inviting Ben Shapiro to speak to the senior business students, Chapman said fuck it and went balls to the wall.

Guys, guys, I am not even shitting you right now, Tom Duncan, freshman film production student doesn’t even like popular things. Any of ‘em guys, he’s so fucking cool.

Student indie music is thriving at Chapman and a new group is trying their best to break into the scene.

Thank you for taking it down. Absolutely totally the right call, I cannot stress enough but like… I wrote such a good article and you guys sorta ruined it?

March Madness has swept the nation, and the little bitch towne of Orange.

Since its opening in 2015, QDOBA Mexican Eats, commonly referred to as “shitty Chipotle”, has been receiving a variety of Yelp reviews.