block and report @hoovesliquor ……….

“We are thrilled to unveil a fourth star on our prestigious Walk of Fame for Janet, who plays girl number 3 in the new season of that one show about college kids!”

RA’s get one universal key and think they’re god or something

Geordie MacMalton answers “What would you do if you were better than everybody else?”

Who really gives a fuck about a New Year’s Resolution?

It was recently announced that Argyros School of Business will no longer be enrolling new students for their hugely popular and successful BA in Making Lots of Money.

Interterm isn’t real and I’ll tell you why.

LET’S BURN SANDI SIMON TO THE GROUND! … again

“They made me DEI chair and I genuinely believe it's just because I’m a little bit funny and have a nose ring.” 

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. For unemployed, booed-up sophomore Allison Thomas, life has never been better.

Bahhh humbug.

Since its unveiling, the true identity of the K’s benefactor has been widely debated, but what if I told you that the answer has been right in front of you… all… along… 

“I think my priority registration gives me access to a flamethrower.”

Everyone knows the dodge majors have the most sex… because personally I have so much sex

Campus is dead.

The Saintiest Saint, Santa Claus is under fire after a 2022 FBI report revealed that those in marginalized communities have not been receiving presents.

Much like the Cold War’s Hollywood Blacklist, many students found themselves on SafeRide’s naughty list this past semester for abusing the service to get to parties, instead of home.

“I’m going to unload unlike ever before. Just watch.”

All Hail Dean Baniele Buppa !!!!!!!!!

bitches need to be taken down a few notches